Inspirations and Resolutions

Last night, I got upset about something and just needed some alone time. I tried sitting outside my residence hall but it just didn't suffice. Then I decided to walk around campus until I found the right spot to just sit and chill. I ended up at the patio of The Lair. It was around 10:30 I think, so there was quite a crowd both inside and outside - so I went to the other side of the patio (something I recently found out about).

One thing that I like about The Lair's patio is that it's got rocking chairs and a beautiful view of campus across the creek. I saw Brookside Hall from across the way and..I had the sudden urge to draw it. I knew exactly how I wanted to draw it and it was just such an inspiring view that I didn't mind going back all the way to my hall and back with my art supplies and bristol pad.

I began to sketch the building - gesture drawing if you will. It took me a good five minutes to lay down the foundation of the piece - I couldn't decide how I wanted big I wanted to draw the building in comparison to the dark sky around it.

Around 11:30, I saw a dark figure (and a dark figure because the small pathway from the main side of the patio to where I was at was not lit with light) heading towards me from the other side of the patio - I didn't worry too much. I was too engaged with my drawing to care and I was also listening to music. And then the dark figure said something. I unplugged and asked him to say it again. "I'm just coming over behind you, I don't want you to get freaked out. And I don't want to mess you up (with the drawing)." He was part of staff and was locking up the chairs together. By this time, I had finished sketching the building in pencil and begun outlining in an extra soft charcoal pencil. He looked over my shoulder and saw what I had so far - he said it looked cool.

One thing I find interesting, and something I think about constantly, is how our self is the most critical critic we will ever meet. Sure, sometimes I will really like my work - usually my graphic design pieces but I am more critical with my drawing - and sometimes, I just don't see what other people see.

I left The Lair just at midnight, taking my time on the walk back to the dorm. As I walked back with my unfinished drawing in my hand and my art box in the other, everywhere I looked, I thought to myself how fun it would be to draw it and how amazing it could look. But, not necessarily a drawing by me - anybody. I especially thought how nice it would be to draw the east entrance to my residence hall, with the old school brick wall and the little alcove the door was encased in, and especially the nature that surrounded. If I didn't hate drawing trees so much, I would give it a shot.

I walked down my hall and immediately sat down outside of my room, as my roommate was already asleep. I sat down against the wall and resumed my drawing right away. Honestly, I wasn't thinking much of the drawing until more people started commenting on it. But even though people said that it was really good and they liked it a lot, all it did was make me feel better not about my drawing skills but just from the shitty mood that started this whole thing. It was only until after I had sprayed fixative over the finished piece did I begin to appreciate my own work. I liked it, too.

The night began with a terrible mood that led me to be inspired by a simple, and literal, vision I had as I tried to alleviate the mood.

Resolution: draw more night landscapes and/or scenery.
Resolution: be less of an extrovert - I'll get more things done that way.